Park-rife Oh - seven

today was great. beautiful weather, happy times and cool music. Video coming soon..

immerse

i love the feeling of immersion ..submerging. The feel of escapism.. being off into another world. Call me a trancer if you will..

I love the feeling of the warmth of the sun. That moment when your ears are full of water when your in the shower. Those tunes that make me think im submeged in water at the aquarium..or floating under water where the sunlight is cutting in through the surface. Those autumn skies with hues of pink and purple.. White/grey skies on a cloudy day.. somewhat feels alien..not from this world.

I love sunrises and sunsets. Ive never watched a sunrise ive fully enjoyed but id love to watch one in summer where apparently there's a contrast between night and morning. The following picture of a sunrise is one of the best ive seen in a while.

Are you up to watch the sunrise with me?

challenged once again..

8:35 express to the city via circular quay

after my moments of standing i got my seat. And it was that time again, reflecting. I dont know what caused me to think of what i was thinking but it just came. For the time i was hanging out with them ive often felt drained and frustrated, often "babying" them. I was put off. I felt tired having to "baby" them. This feeling bothered me and i just wanted to get away from it all.. my mind was just going to all of these random places ..

...but we don't bat an eyelid when the 'fringe-dweller' or 'pew-sitter-in-the-last-row' just drifts away?or we even feel relief when the 'trouble-maker' or 'non-conformist' packs it in and goes to another church...

..they would tell him not to hang around with "those type" but to hang with them.

I then thought of that person during the time when they attempted to socialise with people but failing and retreating in anger and sadness. Thinking of it now in my head really saddens me. I didnt know what to do at the time nor do i think if "these" people knew how to deal with this person either maybe coz he seemed so "different".

Has God challenged me once again to think through of this all?

I remember after being a Christian in year9 i often felt the sense of having to help people out coz it was just the right thing to do. A classmate of mine at the time lent me his CD player to listen at a carnival. I then let another person listen to it and not long after it was gone. I was pretty gutted for it to happen and it seemed so careless to do such a thing because theft was common at carnivals. I forked out $200 for this CD player which was a lot of money.. i mean i could've chosen not to and have gotten the person i lent to deal with it. But a side of me wouldnt have wanted that done to me, nor want to see other suffer.

I spose this goes back to our friend in the first story..the one that most people find it hard to get to know. Inside of me tells me to help out this guy as seeing him like this really does make me sad.. to see him try and get shot down and feeling misery. I spose sometimes this looks the same when we relate to our parents or even God..

?

I was asked "what am I going to do about it?"

now if you're reading this, i'll ask you this, "what are YOU going to do about IT?"

Discouragement, Encouragement, Uplift

"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was to convince the world he never existed.. " a quote from the movie, THE USUAL SUSPECTS

I remember hearing this quote back in highschool ..for what reason i dont think they had a reason for telling me. But it rang true for me. How true does it ring for you?

For the past couple of weeks ive felt discouraged.. discouraged by others. And this is exactly what had challenged me last nite durin the sermon. The evil one, there to throw us off. What was getting at me was having to follow people up..just little things. Having to tell ppl, do this and that. What bugged me thinking now is that im a hypocrite as well..ppl need to remind me as well what i NEED to do.

And i thought..how bout i just sit back and not care and see how things pan out for a bit. And then i was challenged to not give in. Not to slack off. To give up now felt like failure. Failing on people. I didn't want the evil one to win this battle. Something WILL be done about it, and soon.

After the sermon i met up with Dan Pi and this guy was PEAKING! And if uve ever known Dan pi he's a very in your face, straight forward bloke. I love that. I get so much joy chatting to him feeling the energy he gives off. Always a point to make, "business baby! BUSINESS!" He was stressing out points on EXACTLY how i was feeling..and i was so over joyed to hear someone feel the same and more importantly i had struggled to really have gotten to know him..and what really topped it off for me was his passion for people to get under the surface than asking all these "generic" questions.

all in all, great weekend. What i've come to really enjoy is just hanging out with THESE people.. THOSE days were gone ..the times of anti-socialism.. people off in their own world.

Dan - "i've got a new drug..it's called 'G' "
Me - "what's that?"
Dan - "it stands for God"
Me - i look at Dan Oliveira and just laugh...

Legend

!!!

i've never felt so miserable 2nite in a LONG time..

exhale..

moving along now..

7/9/07

i was encouraged onced again. :)

I just realised we dont pray for some of our brothers and sisters that we've forgotten.

But would it set me free
If I dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagine me to be

Would your arms be open
Or would you walk away
Would the love of Jesus
Be enough to make you stay

depressing

a week of rain + boring work + no plans for weekend really bores me..

HAHA, you're a virgin!

2nite at church i heard something that really stood out for me and thought, wow..i really loved that! it went along the lines of..

3 guys go to a cafe.. they're christians with their bibles. The waitress asks them.."so christians can't have sex?" 1 guy answers in reply to this. Its not that we can't have sex..its that ill have the best sex ill ever have with the 1 and only woman. Upon hearing this the waitress broke down in tears..knowing her past of countless sexual relations with countless guys..

What was basically being pointed out that the guy would hold up for the special someone and so as his partner.. having that special someone..leaving your virginity for that special someone that would leave theirs for you as well.

So ive been laughed at ... for being a virgin. Laugh if u will. Laugh all you want. I was put on show once.. how a mate of mine was laughing at me among a small group. One girl asked me if i really was. I didnt say anything at the time. It really did feel awkward at the time. But.. on that day of marriage if i ever do get married.. it would be awesome feeling to know that you both waited for that special someone to share it with, and ONLY them..

but even if they didnt.. another thought is that.. id pray that id accept my partner for who they are as a person.. not trying to find that "perfect" person ..but someone that will help me out to do His will..