patience

my lack of patience got to me again today. sometimes i struggle so badly with it, it eats at me badly. sometimes that pathetic thought comes to me, "why dont i give up". But to me its the thought of one with no will.

Father - fill me with patience!

my life is beautiful

i was at maroubra beach 2day for the first time. such a nice beach and such crazy waves! got smashed by a 7footer!

and i thought as i sat there on the sand. How beautiful my life is so far. And its not by my own works but by God.

When was the last time you sat back and had a thought of your life being awesome?

Treasures in Heaven

Warning : 19"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Rockin it with God

i used to shuffle to the basslines in darkened rooms. I used to put my hands up to the synths and go in time with basslines. I now want to shuffle and put my hands up to God.

5:04pm

im at jo's place at the moment and im mentally tired. Went to mission meet in the morning.. came back from stephs last nite and watced back 2 the future 1 and 2 back to back. I think that's why im so drained.

And i was thinking. Ive felt as if ive picked up some trait from someone. Weird. This feeling of selfishness. Its been pretty strange lately, hearing people experiencing death, going through depression. Thinking back, reading about people going through 'dryness'. And i sometimes think what it would be like to be in their shoes. Sometimes i feel to just not bother.. to bother with certain things coz it seems all too tiring.

I was walking in the street and was thinking hard, to learn, to ask God to teach me to find comfort in Him primarily and not primarily in other people.

It rained today.

lift off

got 2 goodies 2day in the mail. first i got was my Bayern shirt, really need to stop buying so many jerseys. Another thing was that i earlier had bought apple earphones for like $7.50 (postage inc.). They came in the mail damaged, i think the mailman jammed them in the mailbox and screwed them. Either way i complained to the seller and he sent new ones, they work! Will they last, thats the other thing.

yeah

on the way home yesterday my mind thought about what had happened last time.

"Why did you come today?"

I was hurt and annoyed hearing this. But now I look at it and try to be in their shoes. Makes more sense now. Anyways. I have been stand offish coz of all of this.

New Years celebrations was great. There were no others i felt like spending it with at the time except for my "chosen family".

Met some awesome germans, i love germans.

We went to freshwater and watched the sunrise, went to maccas after and i was so tired, didnt want to deal with anyone coz i was so buggered.

Im feeling well.